What To Do If Your Boss Hates You
Working under a boss who does not like you, is not fun. You may be tempted to change jobs which is not a bad idea, but what if you are faced with the same challenge in a new organization with a new boss?
Signs That Your Boss Hates You
The actions and attitude of your boss towards you will give you a clue whether your boss hates you or not. You can be hated for different reasons by your boss. Some of the reasons may be valid, some may be invalid.
Here are signs to show that your boss hates you:
- Micro-management: When your boss is always paying full concentration on your work rather than his/her own, that is a sign that he/she hates you.
- Lack of trust: When your boss does not have confidence in what you do, he/she does not trust your capacity to execute your tasks effectively, that is a sign that your days in the organization are numbered.
- Criticism: If your boss regularly criticizes your work for no justifiable reasons, that is a big red flag for the relationship.
- Your request always gets a “No”: If your boss hates you, any request you make will be turned down. If your boss values you, he/she will explain why your requests always get a “no” or no response at all rather than let you solve the mystery puzzle by yourself.
- Absence of feedback: Constructive feedbacks are a productivity amplifier. If your boss is bad at giving positive feedback but praises others and makes you feel unrecognized, that is a sign of hatred that should not be ignored.
Reasons Why Your Boss Hates You
As an employee, before you conclude that your boss does not like you, sincerely ask yourself if what you are doing is actually what brought you to the organization. Is your behavior and attitude towards your job taking the organization forward or backward?
The following are reasons why your boss hates you:
- Laziness: Your boss did not employ you to be a bench warmer in his/her organization. If it takes you a long time in executing simple tasks like sending emails to clients, your boss will not be happy with you.
- Gossip: One of the major reasons why your boss may not like you might be your involvement in office gossip. If you want to be liked by your boss, do not gossip about him or her.
- Low performance: If you are not performing well at your workplace, your boss may not like you. If your boss always complains about your work, that is a red flag.
- Lack of good work ethics: Every organization has rules and values that govern them. If you as an employee do not abide by the rules, your boss will not like you.
- Lack of coordination: Employees are given job descriptions. Your job description basically tells you what your boss expects from you. If you are not delivering or executing your duties as you ought to, your boss may hate you.
- Mis-information: Your boss’s attitude towards you may be a reflection of what he/she heard about you.
- You can’t work without supervision: There are numerous projects seeking the attention of your boss. If your boss supervises your work every minute, not only will it get your boss angry, you may be fired. As an employee, the need to execute your designated roles with little or no supervision can not be over-emphasized.
What To Do If Your Boss Hates You
If you are having the uncomfortable feeling that your boss does not like you, you will want to do everything to turn things around. The following steps will guide you to rewrite the story.
- Stay involved: From enormous projects to team meetings, you have to be sure that you show up to help in executing tasks. It’s not enough to just get the job done, immerse yourself in your team and your company. Put in your best so that you can be the go-to person for consultations when it comes to how to get things done in the organization.
Despite the fact that your boss might hate you, he/she will not ignore the fact that you are contributing greatly to the growth of the organization.
- Don’t go unnoticed: The fact that your boss does not like you is not an opportunity for you to put your head down and execute your designated role quietly because you do not want to ruffle any feathers. Being un-noticed is not the best option or strategy to deal with a boss that does not like you. Keeping your head low can only take you from being disliked to being unnoticed, which is not going to help you to advance in your career.
If your boss hates you, it may be that your boss does not see you as a benefit to the organization. If you decide to become less involved, your boss may decide to issue you a retrenchment letter.
- Greet your boss with a warm smile: This is a hard one-like how do you smile at someone that hates you for reasons unknown to you?
Greeting your boss with a warm smile is an easy way to get into the heart of your boss. People tend to like those who show interest in them. Do not just stop at greeting, you can go ahead and engage your boss in a casual conversation. Try to get your boss to talk about his/her interest. Learning about your employer’s interest makes the next conversation easier. This act will show that you are concerned about your boss. Show your boss that you are a lovely person and watch how the ice will melt.
- Arrive early at work: It is difficult to rush into a job where you don’t feel loved, appreciated, and wanted, neither is it advisable to bank on the existing factor. Arriving early each working day at your workplace shows that you are passionate about what you are doing. It also indicates that you are eager to get things done, not just done but done on time. Channel your focus on your job and try not to think about your boss too much. Thinking about what you did or did not do to make your boss dislike you will reduce your productivity. Remember that what you are doing is for your career and not for your boss. So focus and execute your tasks excellently.
- Don’t leave early: If you are working under a boss that does not like you, you will always be looking for ways to leave the environment. It is easy to think of excuses when your boss does not like you. Your boss may not know that you are leaving the office to get away from him/her, but they will think that you are running away from your duties especially when you are yet to complete tasks that were assigned to you.
- Compliment your boss: Everyone loves a good compliment. There is nothing wrong with a well-placed compliment. Do not go overboard in complimenting your boss. Keep the compliment at the professional level.
Compliments about physical appearance are not the type of compliment that is work-friendly. Stick to work-related compliments. For example, you can say: I like what you did to your office or that was a nice presentation at the meeting. Do not forget to follow it up with facts /details to show that you really noticed. Who knows? your name may be written in his/her good book.
- Don’t gossip about your boss: When you are not on the good side with your boss, it’s tempting to talk about him/her in the most demeaning ways. Gossiping about your boss, and telling your colleagues that you think that your boss does not like you may put you in bigger trouble. Even if you found a listening ear, resist the urge to discuss your boss because you are not sure of who the person will tell and what the person will say.
Once you have locked yourself in the gossip chain, there are high chances that the news of what you said will get to your boss. You don’t want to be called into the office of your boss for a closed-door meeting only to be welcomed with: I heard that you have been saying these and that about me. How true are your claims are there facts backing them?
Talking about your boss in the most demeaning way is not a good approach to getting your boss to like you-instead it shows that you don’t have respect for your boss and you may not like to see the end of it.
- Add extra effort: If your boss continuously talks down on you, try putting extra effort into getting the job done and make sure that it is in alignment with the expectations of your boss. Try talking about what a successful outcome would look like with your boss. Always make sure that you are on the same page. If the hatred continues despite your hard work, you are probably better off going somewhere where your input will be valued.
- Communicate: Communication is key in everything. If your boss hates you, communicate it to your boss and find out the reasons for the hatred. If you are at fault, you make the necessary adjustments but if your boss is at fault, it’s best you resign because he/she may never find any reason to like you especially if the hatred stems from jealousy.
In conclusion, according to Michael Kerr, an international business speaker and author of the humor advantage, Micheal noted that: the relationship between you and your boss is likely the most important work relationship you can cultivate. So it’s worth spending intentional time and effort building trust and fostering a good relationship. Kerr further said that “you may be unfairly passed over for promotions or raises; miss out on important assignments; never receive fair feedback or be subjected to an atmosphere of resentment and distrust ultimately leading to increased levels of stress that eventually force you to search for a new job. It can also reflect poorly on your performance reviews and mean that you miss out on getting a fair referral when you move on to another job”.
You can not be liked by everyone, your boss inclusive. It is a tough reality to deal with. If your boss respects you and the work that you do, you may just ignore it, but if it is making your stay at the office miserable, follow the above steps to bridge the gap.
